Thoughts are linked and intertwined with our actions and emotions.
They are neither good or bad, right or wrong.. but they can be helpful or harmful.
Being aware (mindful) of our thoughts allows us to look at our feelings and behaviors to determine how the things we are thinking influence us.
If we assess our thought to be harmful (ie: resulting in unwanted/unhealthy behaviors) then we can work on challenging those thoughts to make them helpful instead of harmful.
I get upset when the kids slurp their food at the table in the morning… eating noises really bother me… and when this happens I have a tendency to tell them to go eat somewhere else.
I don’t like this behavior. I want don’t want to push my kids away.
My thought, “the food noise’s bother me,” in this scenario is harmful because it feeds the behavior of me pushing the kids off to another room. It is the gateway to negative feelings like irritation, anger, guilt, and shame.
Looking at this thought as the harmful contributor to unwanted behaviors I can challenge it and change my perspective to make it helpful.
Food noises may bother me, but I can be grateful that my kids want to be around me and that I can provide for them. This shift in thinking can now become helpful in deterring the unwanted behaviors and emotions.
What harmful thoughts do you need to challenge?
If you want to discuss things a little further, check out our closed facebook discussion group to share your thoughts and join in the discussion. Or you can email me directly at Jon@masteryofskill.com. If you are interested in further reading check out other Food for Thought articles and learn all about the Archetypes of Skill. You can also sign up to receive The Friday Huddle, a short weekly email from me that gives you the tips, insights, and musings that have gotten me through the week.